Many
of us believe, without question, that loving intimate relationships
follow a linear progression that goes something like this:
- You
become Friends
- You
become Boyfriend/Girlfriend
- You
become Engaged to be married
- You
are Married
- You
buy a house together
- You
have kids together
- Divorce,
Death or a break-up ends the relationship
But,
in reality the actual steps to a "deep" relationship don't
arise in any order, and may never all be attainable. Here they are:
- You are completely honest with your partner
about your past and present -- you don't keep secrets or avoid
certain facts or subjects.
- You realize that you care a great deal about
your partners happiness, and you find it easy and pleasurable to
bring your partner happiness.
- You realize that you want to have sex
exclusively with your partner.
- You realize that you want to cohabitate with
your partner.
- You tell you partner you love
them, and you mean it.
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